Wednesday, August 27, 2008

A+

Being the kind of person that I am, it comes as no surprise that my blood type is A+. Coming from a girl who's self esteem is so wrapped up performance, I'd really expect nothing less of myself. Or my blood.

I didn't know my blood type until last week--when I decided to give blood for the first time in 6 years.

"Oh, it's been a while," said the nurse at the blood mobile.
"Yes, yes it has," I replied.
"Well, with such a drought between donations, this will be like your first time all over again."

She smiled sweetly and began gathering her supplies: needles, latex gloves, some tubing.

"You didn't faint did you?"
"Oh, God. No. I was fine. A little woozy. But nothing major."
"That's good. This mobile is too small to have people falling over."
(So much for the supposed sympathy that comes with being a first timer.)
"I don't think it should be a problem," I offered.

She smiled again and asked if my arm was comfortable.

I nodded yes, took a deep breath, and relaxed into the chair she'd prepared for me. As I did so, I noticed my arm would be more comfortable if it moved ever-so-slightly to the right. So I moved it. The nurse's back was turned. And it didn't seem like a big deal. Plus, I was giving my blood. I figured I should be as comfortable as possible.

With eyes in the back of her head and a sixth sense for any kind of limb activity, she turned around as if someone had spilled an entire IV of platelets.

"What are you doing?" she barked.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought I'd be more comfortable like this."
(Why was I apologizing?)
"You can't just move your arm. Now I have to start over."
Start over?, I thought. But nothing's begun.

She then jammed me with a plastic needle cover. 

"What was that?" I cried.
"I have to do that so I know where your vein is," she said--defensively.
"I don't understand," I said, shaking my head. "Can't you see where my vein is? It's the blue thing underneath my impossibly white skin."
(OK. So I didn't actually say that. But that's what I thought.)

Eventually we got the kinks worked out, and she started to draw blood. 

I'll have you know that I was done donating in under 5 minutes. That's right. 1 pint in less than 300 seconds, despite the abuse from the RN on the mobile. Thank you very much. 

A+ is right. 

2 comments:

Chris Colburn said...

"I give you an A+ ....... "

Anonymous said...

I give that RN a C-